My Fellow Colleagues

 

 

Good Chatting with You!

 We have come to a close of another meaningful course in our early childhood studies journey. I must say that by far, this course has provided me with much insight into myself as a communicator and how I may be a more effective communicator both in my professional life and personal life.

When I began to implement some strategies for good communication, I saw immediate results… bordering on the miraculous! I am excited as I have a whole slew of projects going forth in mine and my husband’s ministry.   I am using the communication tools learned through the course and from connecting and collaborating with many of you all! I have learned so much from your posts and comments; you have helped me to grow.

I wish you much success!

 

Sheila Lee

Adjourning

Now it's Time to Say Goodbye...

I was a part of a non-profit group that was organized to plan a fund raising gala. We went through all of the stages of team building; forming, storming norming, performing and adjourning. There were good points and low points of this team. The major thing that I noticed about our group when we were at that adjourning stage , we were all so connected and  so grateful that our endeavors proved to be a great for success for the organization we were planning the fundraising for. To bring closure to this stage, we all said that we would keep in touch with one another and we had sort of a pot luck, job well done meeting to close out. It was hard to leave as we had worked well together and were successful in or goal of fundraising for the organization

 

When I get to the adjourning stage of my studies here at Walden, I imagine I would look out for keeping contact with individuals I had a great rapport with. Departing would be bitter-sweet as we have become interdependent and we contribute to the learning of one another. 

The adjourning stage is essential stage of teamwork as it allows the involved individuals to reflect on strengths and weaknesses of the team so that these issues can be noted for future references. Adjourning reminds us of our interdependence we have with others and how much we need others to get along in life.

Conflict Resolution

Two Strategies for Conflict Resolution

 

 

Based on the scores from the communications evaluations taken last week, I have begun to put operatives in place in my professional as well as personal life to better communicate with others. My strategies would include using the nonviolent communication skills utilizing the “2 Parts and 4 Components of NVC”  and utilizing the Three R’s.

The NVC Model suggests this:

Emphatically Listening        Honestly Expressing

                                           Observations                         Observations

                                           Feelings                                     Feelings

                                           Needs                                          Needs

                                           Requests                                    Requests

 

Using this model for communication can enhance relationship so there are little misunderstandings and misinterpretations.

 

The three R’s communication strategy is based on communication that is respectful, reflective and reciprocal rather than reactive.

 I must admit that my communication with people I am familiar with was more reactive than reflective.  The evaluations helped me realize this was not the most productive way to communicate on any level.  "Unproductive conflict is poorly managed conflict and has a negative impact on individuals and relationships" (O'Hair & Wiemann, p. 220).  I began to use both strategies and immediately saw results in getting my needs and request met in communication. Wow!

How about some of you? Have you been successful in implementing strategies for better communication?




O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's

Blog

Operation Communication Evaluation

Well, we are evaluating our communicating styles and taking notice of the differences and similarities of how we evaluated ourselves and how others evaluated us. This is how I stack up:

I enjoy communicating with others and tend to prefer listening to others. I am also non-confrontational and try to look for ways to communicate that present less “static”

The evaluation of my communication as given by someone else says that I am confident and comfortable with speaking in a large group. I am also confident with talking to others I do not know. I am viewed as being respectful even when angered in conversation; My husband says different, however.

This did not come as a surprise but my conversation is seen as informational, as in I do not engage in much small talk. I like to listen to others but I have little patience for those that usurp and dominate a conversation. I will make excuses to escape!!! My score read as action oriented by another.

I can say that the greatest insight about this week’s learning about communication is how random and mindless our thoughts can be when we first encounter people. As we speak we learn more of the people we are speaking to and begin to file yet another experience in our minds to fit additional patterns of schema. When dealing with our students and parents as education professionals, everything we say is measured by them.  

When making mindless assumptions based on past experiences it is important that we let the children and the parent speak to us and tell us what they desire for their children. The parents depend so much on our being professional in every way.

This is eye opening, good stuff I tell you!

My Scores

Score; Communication Anxiety 37 - mild

Score; Verbal Aggressiveness 68 – moderate

Score;  Group 1 – people oriented

Family Evaluated Score; communication Anxiety – 33 – Low

Family Evaluated Score;  Verbal Aggressiveness – 69 – Significant (according to my husband)

Friend Evaluated Score:  Listening styles – Group 2 – Action Oriented

A Universal Moral Code

I do find myself communicating to people of different cultures in a different way. I may adjust my speech, my tone, and the choice of words.  I have learned in the readings that to be effective in seeking out our “other-oriented” opportunities, we have to become flexible in our communication styles. The best ways to do that are to;

1.     Adapt – meaning to adjust our behavior to accommodate the other person’s differences and expectations. Adapting also means to be sensitive to what the other person is saying, thinking, and doing. People who adapt their behavior to others will have more success in positive communication.

2.    Learn of the world view of other cultures. This would reduce uncertainty when trying to communicate.

3.    Avoid negative judgments.  If an individual from another culture has a practice of doing things that may not be an ordinary practice of my culture, I should not stand in judgment or say that practice is all wrong. For example, it is customary for many folks from The Asian areas of the world to speak softly and not look a person directly in the eye. This behavior is showing respect and humility to another.  In the west, we view that behavior as disrespectful.

All in all, we should learn as we interact (Beebe,Beebe & Redmond) with others. We have to put ourselves in the other person’s mindset and mental position. Being flexible is the best way to have success in communication with those from other cultures.

 References

Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.

Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication

Our assignment was to view a television broadcast with the sound off and observe the communication styles. Then we were to turn the sound on and observe the verbal cues to give clue to the relationship of the characters. I chose a program I do not normally watch called “The New Normal”.

Sound Off

Based on the observation of non-verbal actions of the characters, they related to onaother and they were a family. The child in the situation was having difficulty at school and it looks like she was getting advice from the concerned adults in her life. I saw there were hugs and one on one communication between the child and the adults. In  one of the scenes there was a lot of body language modeled for the child to help her in her school situation. I suppose this child was to act out these body movements to the school children she was having difficulty with and that action would solve her problem.

Sound On

The observation of the episode with the sound on was very much as I had interpreted with the sound off. The child in the episode was surrounded by adults who cared about and they decided to give her assistance when she was confronted with mean girls at school. I did notice that when one solution to the mean girl problem backfired, the child went back to her adult care givers for more advice. This second round of solutions was more radical in handling the mean girl situation which involve curt language a very straight-forward tone of voice and the body movements that I had observed with the sound off.

Conclusion

My final thoughts on this observation assignment is that according to what he have rad from O’Hair and Wiemann, the skill of communication involves all the senses verbal, non-verbal, and cross culturally to deliver a message for understanding and to be understood. A sense of self is greatly factored into communication. As “the self-concept has incredible power to shape your communication with others”( O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012).

 

References

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St.

Welcome Communication

 

 

 

“Everything in me calls on me to teach”    

– Louise Derman Sparks

There is a professor I have become acquainted with while being enrolled here at Walden University, taking the Master of Science in Early childhood Studies courses.  This is a person I would even model my communication style after from time to time

That One such person is Professor Louise Derman- Sparks. I really love how she has such a soothing way about her communication. What she says and the way she says it just draws you in to her and the subject she speaks about.  She presents a pleasant expression on her face when communicating also coupled with wisdom and knowledge in the field of early childhood.  The one thing I must mention is that to me, she exudes tremendous passion when she speaks about the field of early childhood. It is not displayed in a boisterous fashion or a loud openly charismatic way, but it seems to me that it is communicated with love and purposeful intent because she is talking about what God has put in her to do… to love young children and educate them through nurturing their special unique little selves.

 

Louise Derman Sparks Professor Emeritus Pacific Oaks College

Research Areas: Louise Derman-Sparks’ research areas of interest are race and education and multicultural education. Activities & Honors: Louise Derman-Sparks is a long-time human development faculty member at Pacific Oaks College, now Professor Emeritus. Previously, Ms. Derman-Sparks worked with young children and families as an early childhood education teacher and program director. She is the author and co-author of several books, including: Anti-Bias Curriculum: Tools for Empowering Young Children, (National Association for the Education of Young Children); Teaching/Learning Anti-Racism: A Developmental Approach (Teachers College Press); In Our Own Way: How Anti-Bias Work Shapes Our Lives and Future Vision, Current Work: Lessons from the Culturally Relevant Anti-Bias Education Leadership Project (Redleaf Press), and numerous articles and book chapters. Her most recent book, co-authored with Dr. Patricia Ramsey, is titled “What If All the Kids are White?” Anti-bias/ Multicultural Education with Young Children and Families, (Teachers College Press, April 2006). Ms. Derman-Sparks speaks, conducts workshops and consults widely throughout the United States and internationally. A former member of the Governing Board of the National Association for the Education of Young Children (1998-2002), she currently serves on the National Board of Crossroads Ministry: An Interfaith & Community- Based Anti-Racism Training Organization and on the National Diversity Advisory Council of the Boys & Girls Clubs of America. Ms. Derman-Sparks is the mother of a son and daughter, Douglass and Holly Sparks, and has been an activist for social justice for 40 years.